Haha, what a great question! That is precisely the question that prompts us to search for our primal essence. And you have chosen a very nice title for your beautiful magazine. When I let the word Primal Woman work on me, I feel something very old. As if you immediately connect the readers of your magazine with their true, authentic essence.
It’s special how this conversation starts. Because with the question ‘who are you?’ I immediately get images of what I have identified with over the past 60 years. Discovering pieces of myself that others mirrored to me. With gratitude that I now am where I am in terms of consciousness, I remember my long search.
My life became a lot easier when I was able to experience the considerable pile of ‘problems’ I encountered growing up as opportunities for growth and blessings.Well… This goes straight into depth. Should I first tell you something about my own life? Then I like to connect it to the core of our journey here on earth. All those stories of what I’ve experienced are not really that important. I would like to share what I discovered as a result; something that others may also be able to identify with. That seems to me to be the most interesting for the readers.
A glimpse into my youth
I was born in a musical family in Apeldoorn. Music was instilled in me from an early age. My parents, my older sister and I always made music. All four of us are professionally trained at a conservatory (university for music). By the way: my mother passed away two years ago; my 92 year old father still plays various instruments, several times a week! Behind that musicality we have an enormous sensitivity and a great need for harmony; all four of us learn to deal with this in our own way.
During my first three years on earth I was a happy and busy little bee. I was at the forefront of everything, I was very sensitive (and, I only understood later, also clairsentient), but I really enjoyed life and enjoyed all those sounds around me! In the box I sang ‘Michelle’ of the Beatles in its own kind of phonetic language, haha.
Then I had my first difficult experience, which brought me back to previous lives with a big bang; the disempowered woman. Apparently, before I incarnated, I had already decided to work on this theme as quickly as possible in this life! But it was only much later, during various sessions in my twenties, that I was able to relive that experience several times and feel it again. That was the only way I could come to terms with it. After that I ultimately understood why I had that experience.
I have even been able to forgive the man who – as I look at it – had taken on the role of perpetrator. I could still describe everything about our parental home in Apeldoorn, where it happened; right down to the colors of the kitchen cabinets and countertops…
I turned rather inward at an early age and was confronted enormously with my fears. From that moment on I became much more quiet. I had lost my primal confidence and became wary of other people. From that moment on, everything that I previously expressed freely, I could only express in my own piano playing. The piano was truly my salvation, my greatest friend to whom I could entrust everything. I have completed my entire music school and university career as a piano teacher and concert pianist, with performing arts in the Netherlands and abroad.
But once I became a celebrated pianist, in addition to all the earthly successes, a very deep question arose in me: “Who am I if I would be no longer ‘Mieke piano’?” I had completely identified with ‘the pianist’ in me. And when she literally fell over – not just because of all the commotion, competition and demandingness that I imposed on myself, but also because other parts of me wanted to be discovered – my inner path began with years of self-examination. My spiritual quest, so to speak.
This is part 1 of an interview about my personal life, for a Dutch Magazine called ‘Primeval Woman’